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I am Kate Mother of two. How To Raise a Lady??? Join Me! Ask Me Anything

caths1981
Sep 11, 2017

Raising a child is not easy especially teaching them to begin lives with good manners. Good manners begins with assimilation of the examples set by parents. This is a great guide for parents who want to do the right thing, but may need a few pointers themselves. Real-Life advice, time-tested tips and lessons learned. Always remember that good manners are the practical application of kindness. So it is never too soon to begin or too late to catch up.  

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Where do your standards for behavior come from? What is the authority that determines what is considered rude and acceptable? I'm not talking about for your children (as I think it is clear that you are the authority in your relationship), what determines what you consider acceptable for them?

Sep 12, 11:57PM EDT0

Hello JR NEAL! Thanks for asking. I am not sure about the "standards" your referring to but I am just doing my job as a hands on mom. I was raised to be a strong woman, not because I have to but because that's how my parents prepared me from challenging world of life. I may have standards on how to raise my kids but again what we believed in varies in the culture that we have. I may have diferrent culture and beliefs I believe that when it comes to making decisions it will always between me and my husband. Rudeness is when children tends to forget what right manners have been taught to them. That's still acceptable and understandable depending on the situation. 

Last edited @ Sep 13, 4:35AM EDT.
Sep 13, 2:47AM EDT0

but u looking so smart what age r your kids

Sep 12, 7:11AM EDT0

Hello Malik! Thanks for asking. You get to learn when your in the situation. So you pick whatever you learn from your childhood and apply it. My eldest is 7 and y youngest is 3. 

Sep 12, 7:44AM EDT0

u r not looking a mother of two r u sereios

Sep 12, 7:07AM EDT0

Hello Malik! Thanks for asking. That's a compliment but its true Iam a mother of two kids.

Sep 12, 7:10AM EDT0

Why do you want to raise a lady, is it not enough if your child knows how to behave?

Sep 11, 11:01AM EDT0

hi Alarson! Thanks for asking. Having good behavior is not enough for a child to be called a lady or woman. A Lady will not know how to react or take action on certain situation if she was not guided and teach by her parents. So It takes a lot of responsibility as a parent.

Sep 12, 12:18AM EDT0

How do you discipline your children?

Sep 11, 9:31AM EDT0

Hi Raymond! Thanks for asking. Discipline is one challenge for a mom like me. I Talk to them a lot. If they did something wrong I immediately correct them privately. Never ever correct nor discipline kids in front of others or in crowd. If they did something wrong they lost the opportunity to watch TV for couple of days nor use and play gadgets. I do not use hands to discipline my kids. It all depends on parents on how or in what ways they want to discipline their kids. 

Sep 11, 10:17AM EDT0
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How old are your children?

Sep 11, 4:38AM EDT0

Hi Mark! Thanks for asking. My eldest is 7 and my youngest is 3

Sep 11, 4:50AM EDT0
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What should a lady have to be able to do in your opinion?

Sep 11, 4:20AM EDT0

Hi Zjennings! Thanks for asking. A Lady should be able to represent herself regardless of who she is, what she looks like, where she came from and what she believes in. Becoming a lady is a very challenging stage of puberty. There would be a lot of changes in mind and body. A lady should always be strong and brave enough to face life  as she grows more as a matured woman. 

Sep 11, 4:55AM EDT0
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Do you think boys and girls should be brought up differently in terms of manners?

Sep 11, 3:12AM EDT0

hello Jacob80! Thanks for asking. I think so, Yes. they have different attitudes, characteristics, personalities nor behavior so they can respond differently. 

Sep 11, 3:42AM EDT0
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When do you teach a child table manners?

Sep 11, 12:42AM EDT0

Hi Nicole! Thanks for asking. I started teaching my kids table manners as early as 3 years old. As long as they can grab a hold on spoon I started teaching them to eat alone but ofcourse with guidance. I teach them on what to do on and before eating. If we have guest at home they already know the table manners. 

Sep 11, 2:21AM EDT0
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How many children do you have?

Sep 11, 12:28AM EDT0

Hello MatthewBrown! Thanks for asking. I have two kids

Sep 11, 2:17AM EDT0
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My children (4 kids) are all well behaved when it matters but they are kids. Why is it so important to you that girls behave like ladies?

Sep 10, 11:35PM EDT0

Hi Paul! thanks for asking. I am impressed that you raised your kids well and not all parents can do that. Its always a struggle and challenging role as a parent to have kids well mannered. It is very important for me to mold and teach my kids things that they need to learn so that when they reached adulthood they are prepared. Its their tool, equiptment on facing life's challenges. Honestly I dont want them to grow so fast. If its possible for them to be kids forever I would love that. So I always cherish every moment with my kids. 

Sep 11, 2:17AM EDT0
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What age do you start teaching your child?

Sep 10, 5:58PM EDT0

Hello Aaron! thanks for asking. I started teaching my eldest bathroom manners at the age of 3. So if she wanted to go to the bathroom to pee or poop she just tell me and she run so fast straight to the bathroom. When I get there to check on her she's done. Same goes to my youngest.

Sep 11, 2:10AM EDT0
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What do you teach boys?

Sep 10, 3:13PM EDT0

HI! Maria. thanks for asking. I would love to answer your question, thing is I dont have a boy. I have two wonderful daughters. So I dont have anything to share when it comes to raising a boy. 

Sep 11, 2:08AM EDT0
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Do you pick up on everything they do wrong or do you allow them to be kids?

Sep 10, 3:12PM EDT0

Hi Lisa! I always remember this, A Happy mom has happy kids and happy home. Kids can be so annoying sometimes but that's normal. Expect kids to be kids. Its just a matter of how you deliver and how you raise them. I dont pick up on everything they do wrong, but if its too much and serious matter, I just talk to them and do what we call " REAL TALK" instead of using your hands on disciplining them much better to talk to them and if they continue doing wrong there will always be consequences. And I am strict with that. If I say NO its a NO! If I say Maybe or Yes I make sure that they fully understand reasons. 

Sep 11, 2:06AM EDT0
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What if my child has behavioral problems, how should I deal with that?

Sep 10, 2:13PM EDT0

Hello Kathy! Thanks for asking. I hope you dont misinterpret me but I suggest have your child check to a specialist. Sometimes we take forgranted our childs behavior when It can be a sign of disorder. Sometimes behavioral problems or hyperactive can be sign of disorder, stress or depression. If your child is a teen talk to him or her in a way that she would feel so secured and you will understand her from what she is experiencing right now. Let your child talk. There are many possible reason as for why your child has behavioral problems, But I suggest you talk to your kid first. 

Last edited @ Sep 11, 1:58AM EDT.
Sep 11, 1:57AM EDT0
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What is it that you teach your children?

Sep 10, 1:58PM EDT0

HI Daniel! thanks for asking. As hands on mom I was able to teach them Manners in Early Social Interventions, Regional Devides, Ways on proper greetings and leavings, Manners during were out like when were shopping, offices, and waiting rooms, Social Interactions on playgrounds, playdates and playing with others, Dining in and out, Cultural Affairs like watching movies with the entire family, Travelling Manners, Bathroom Habits and Personal Hygiene, Telephone Manners, Church and School manners.

Sep 11, 1:51AM EDT0
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My child has defiance disorder and is hyperactive. I am happy if I can achieve the simplest things. Does that make me a bad mother just because she doesn't behave like a lady?

Sep 10, 1:58PM EDT0

Hello Michelle! thanks for asking. Children with disorder needs extra attention and guidance. Its not a simple responsibility to do. Sometimes we ran out of patience and hope that things might turn the way we wanted it to be. That's ok you can always have time to relax and think of things that you can do more for your childs life and future. Dont ever think that you are a bad mother because no mother in the whole world would ever want her children to get hurt or be in a bad situation. We always want things best for our children. Piece of advice you can search for institutions/company who offers extra special course or sessions for children with disorder. 

Sep 11, 1:41AM EDT0
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What do you mean by raising a lady?

Sep 10, 1:37PM EDT0

Hi Phillip! thanks for asking. Raising a Lady for me means raising and preparing my kids (two lovely daughther especially my eldest ) on her way to being or becoming a Lady. Thanks

Sep 11, 1:35AM EDT0
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Apart from good manners, what other things you think is important as a mother?

Sep 10, 6:15AM EDT0

Hi Poorvi! Thanks for asking. The role of being a mother is still the divine mission assigned to women alone. Most mother strives to nurture and teach a child to have good manners as they grow. Mother's are timeless teachers in the classroom of child's life. We are the most influential educators. Mother's teaches us to boost our confidence and belief in ourserlves. 

Nowadays Mom's can actualy do both role as parents. Not just carrying and giving birth. Not just taking care and looking after home. We mom's can actually and literally work to sustain everyday needs in life. To plan, reach goals and also to be a better provider of the family. Do whatever she wants to do, to make her life more meaningful and to what makes her happy but not setting aside and taking important things for granted.

Sep 10, 6:33AM EDT0
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What is your advise for mothers who want to unhook her kids from the use mobile gadgets and take them back to the field or park to play?

Sep 10, 4:54AM EDT0

Hi Shilpa! thanks for asking. As a parent, Ofcourse I want my child to grow up with the knowledge and skills that will help her, and using technology seems to be part of the skill set that she needs. Although technology can help a lot its addictive effects have become a growing concern. I do not intend to argue about whether technology use in children is good or bad. I have seen how helpful it is in education, research, and almost every aspect of our lives. On the other hand, I can understand how it can ruin lives when one is on their device too much. At home we have this " REAL TALK" wherein I just talk to my kids and tell them stories of advantages and disadvantages of using gadgets or mobile phones, even let them watched some videos I saved about excessive using of gadgets ( news about mobile phone explode using while on charging ) it worked on my kids but I do not recommend it doing if you dont want to. Or if they really cant resist on using gadgets. Make rules on when they can use and play with it. At home kids can only use and play gadgets during weekends but during weekdays study first! And once a week I always make sure to go out with kids. Play at the park with their friends. 

Sep 10, 5:14AM EDT0
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What's the most challenging experience did you have being a mother?

Sep 9, 1:44PM EDT0

Hello Ecner! thanks for asking. Honestly? Breastfeeding. Not all moms are in favor of this especially if you have a job or career. But there are a lot of advantages of breastfeeding one is that children would not get easily sick because of the nutrients breastfeeding can give. And they say kids breastfed are smarter than bottled feeding. 

Last edited @ Sep 10, 6:20AM EDT.
Sep 9, 2:04PM EDT0
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What do you think of the future challenge you are going to face when you have to raise a teenager?

Sep 9, 1:28PM EDT0

That's a good question Ricardo! Picture a teenager asked permission to sleep over friends house for school projects well in fact its just a party on a friends house. She met friends of her friends. Chat with classy girls, Tried alcohol and got so drunk that she couldnt even move her legs get up and fell asleep. After month's she got pregnant. Just imagine that. You could lost one kid because of that one particular event. Alcohol, Sets of friends, Internet and early sexualisation are just some of the future challenges a parent will face. And if all of this is currently happening to your child there is no way that kid would have a better life in future. 

Sep 9, 2:00PM EDT0
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What do you find the hardest about being a mother? Do you think things will get easier as your kdis get older?

Sep 9, 12:43PM EDT0

Hi Brandon! Children are not born with good manners and that's one of the many hardest challenge being faced by every mom like me, is to teach and mold my kids to have good manners as they grow.  "Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others. If you have that awareness, you have good manners, no matter what fork you use." It is easy to teach and mold a kid rather than a teenage one. So Its best to teach kids good manners at the early age. So It wont be difficult to them to do and be good example to others. Thanks for asking.

Last edited @ Sep 9, 1:07PM EDT.
Sep 9, 1:05PM EDT0
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